TRY

This is my third blog post of the day. TEE HEE =3 It's a bit unusual for me to post so often, but I could use some "unusual" lately.

Tonight my mum and I watched Imogen Heap's "Everything In-Between- The Story of Ellipse." It's a DVD comprised of documentation of about three years of her life writing, struggling, producing and releasing her latest record, Ellipse.

I bought the movie on iTunes so now I can be inspired over and over and over again. :] Because I did find it very inspiring- which I need desperately right now.

I related to her struggles with deadlines (they kill, PUNNY), her ambition and her unwillingness to compromise her work.

It spoke to me (especially right now) because I'm stuck in one of the stages she was stuck in while making her album. To see her overcome that by working so hard and pushing forward gave me a bit of a wake up call.

I really want this. But lately, I haven't been acting like it. I need to get myself back in that headspace, back in the game- if you will.

To do this, I just need to simply try.

I don't think I have been lately. I could blame it on being bombarded with other seemingly more pressing things like school, my play, friends, life, etc... But I need to do this more than a lot of other things I've been replacing it with.

I really think my lack of progress with my record and my music is weighing on me- this is negative, of course. One of the best feelings for me is to work on something (I can work on producing a song for as long as seven hours straight) and have something to show for myself. Lately, I've been feeling (not to sound too... emo BUT) useless.

It's invigorating to create something out of nothing. It's exciting to grow and achieve goals that you truly and earnestly want to achieve.

My voice is haggard and my body and mind is tired. Tonight I'll take it easy, go to bed early. Tomorrow, I plan to really try with my album and the songs I've been working on for it.

I'm gonna start to give it a good go. (How's that for an alliteration?) ^^

Signing off after announcing yet ANOTHER revelation :P

K

Revelation (IMPORTANT NEWS ABOUT MY ALBUM)

UGH.

I can't blog.

In this very "composition box," I've tried four different ways to start off this post.

None of them have proven successful, so we'll see if this one does...

What I've been wanting to tell you- what I've been struggling to tell you (I can't seem to speak properly today)- is I've had a revelation.

I know. So dramatic- but it's true.

This summer I was so determined that I was going to complete my album, that I forgot about everything else. Everything else being, my friends, my family, the beach, the river, the sun, late night movie marathons, playing grounders at the park... everything that I was also excited for when that last school bell rang.

I tied myself, unconditionally, to recording and producing my album. Which, I thought was good at the time. I was devoted- and don't get me wrong, I love doing it, but the part I don't love about it is the part I brought upon myself.

The stress.

Even after my first "deadline" fell through (which was set for the beginning of summer), I created another one right after, being for the end of summer.

I should have learned the first time it wasn't going to work in the same way.

I also should have known that a measly two months goes by really fast.

I've been told by some very wise people to not set a deadline for an album- to only announce it when it's finished. Otherwise, that deadline will be in the back of your mind the entire process, reminding you of the pressure and responsibility of keeping your word, making the experience inevitably

NOT FUN.

Now I really understand that concept, as I've been living it the past few months.

And now I've come full circle, having realized what it is I have to do next...

The same thing I've been doing, only without the stress and the pressure and the responsibility.

I am now officially allowing myself to continue on with my album, carefree.

I assure you, the finished product will be much more desirable, as I can now breathe.

^^ ahhh.

It feels better already!

So, to make sure you know what I mean, my album does NOT have a release date. I don't know when it will be finished. I could give an estimated guess, but that's almost as bad as a deadline itself.

However, I will keep you up to date with it's progress, through my blog, so you can estimate for yourself. ;)

I'll write soon- actually...

Till next time! =P

K ☮